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Gestational Dreaming
May 13, 2006
Wee Feet ~ Canon 30d
When I became chronically ill for close to a year back in 2004/2005, I stopped dreaming. Persistent insomnia drove me to take ambien long term, and although the drug allowed me to get the rest my body required, it wiped out my ability to remember even one of them. I awoke one September morning to a cruel realization ~ I'd been robbed of my nightly visions and archetypal fantasies. It felt like another nail in my flesh ~ yet another symptom to come to grips with and somehow tolerate.
I'm glad to say I've been off the sleeping pills for almost a year, which means I frequently remember my dreams now. A few days ago, I awoke with the remembrance of just having found myself to be pregnant. I was in the middle of enjoying some time with a friend and looked down to see my stomach warp out in the shape of a tiny hand print. I wasn't freaked out at all, rather, I was pretty amazed by it. In the dream, I was wondering to myself how my condition could have gone unnoticed for such a long time. I sat marveling at my belly and taking in my pregnant condition when my eyes shot open ~ suddenly awake, and fully amused by the subconscious spin cycle my mind had just put me through.
I have explanations, of course ~ tomorrow is Mother's Day, and my dear friend, Joy, will be giving birth to her first child any day now. I shot the image above less than two weeks ago while enjoying an aritist's date with myself at a favorite Tea House. I've been immersed in a kind of transcendental tea bag experience ~ steeping in the warm gestational fluid of some sort of motherhood theme these last weeks. Spring has sprung, I've been taking pictures and producing animations like crazy ~ why, it's been a hubbub of creativity!
Still, I couldn't help but ponder over the official symbolism of my dream, so I did a google search and found the following ~
... pregnancy is a symbol of new ideas, new feelings, talents, behaviours that need some attention. If you dream of being pregnant, it means that you need to put your new ideas into action.
Boy, am I trying to get my newest ideas off the ground ~ working so hard to give birth to my new business ventures. The interpretation rings true with where I am right now ~ excited, inspired and little bit scared of the path I've set my feet upon. Wondering if I will succeed ~ worrying if my choice is a sound one. These are all normal feelings for someone preparing to give birth to a cherished dream growing inside of them.
I'd like to invite you to think about the tiny things percolating inside you now. What ideas and projects you've been working hard on, or just toying with. Nothing is born overnight ~ patience and planning are required as our dreams knit themselves together. Are you building your nest, and preparing a home for your treasures when they come to full fruition?
Just wondering ~ and, Happy Mother's Day!
Posted by vincent at May 13, 2006 06:18 PM
Comments
makes me just want to kiss those wee toes
Posted by: aola at May 13, 2006 10:52 PM
Precious picture! And yes, I can completely relate!!!! The school year is ending for me in two weeks and I just informed the principal that I won't be back next year. I LOVE the school and the staff is AMAZING, but I don't feel right putting my painting on the side. I'm taking a big risk in deciding to make my art my sole salary, but it's a decision that I feel I have to make.... anyway... I think I'm probably right there with you in wondering if I will succeed or if this decision has been a sound one. Good Luck to both of us!!!!!
Posted by: Windy at May 13, 2006 11:33 PM
Just a delicious photo of those sweet tootsies! Nothing like baby skin in all the world. Interesting dreams.... we all need to listen to our dreams more, discover our passions, and reach toward our earthy dreams.
Posted by: samtzmom at May 14, 2006 08:30 AM
I think "success" is the learning and growth we experience while following our muse. It isn't the end of the road where we are rewarded with fame and fortune. That is also success but it is secondary to permitting yourself to get out of your own way, to make choices, sometimes right on, sometimes regretable. It's the "allowing" that counts and success is the gift of being able learn from every single thing that we do.
I Love those tiny toes....
Posted by: jzr at May 14, 2006 10:16 AM
Glorious writing and image, I thought those feet where from a cherub that you caught a glimpse of as you woke up!
Dreaming of pregnancy and babies, is a dream to be assured by, such a symbol speaks new birth in ones endeavors!
Posted by: tongue in cheek at May 14, 2006 01:27 PM
Happy Mother's Day. I was always a sucker for toes.
Posted by: Cynthia at May 14, 2006 04:56 PM