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Born Again
April 27, 2006
Beautiful Death ~ Canon 30d
This tulip spoke to me a week ago as I pitter-pattered along the sidewalk lining the Franciscan monastery in Northeast DC. A dying blossom brilliantly adorned with crystal raindrops. Me thinks there's a metaphor in there somewhere, whispering tales of the beauty of letting go, of dying, and transitioning.
Have you ever watched a tulip begin its final transformation? They actually manage to turn themselves inside out. All that remains in an inner core as they stand stripped of their uniqueness. I love the metaphorical, subtle clues in nature.
There's a not-so-subtle message in our culture, and it reads like this: Feeling bad is very, very bad. Illness? Even worse. So much so, you really should be ashamed of it. What a healthy way of looking at the world ~ so in tune with reality, isn't it?
Years ago, when I was crippled by persistent panic attacks, my doctor told me, "you know, susan... anxiety and depression aren't inherently bad. They can be healthy indicators of an imbalance which needs to be corrected." Words of healing. It was okay to be freaked out. My body, in its wisdom, was alerting me to an underlying problem. My spirit was sick ~ anxiety was a symptom.
Like you, I take in this world we live in, and I am often overwhelmed by it. It saddens and depresses me, and why the hell shouldn't it? We could collectively take a hint from the epidemic of mental illness in the world and in this country. It would require growing up and letting go of the pretty wrappings ~ allowing our illusions to fall like petals at our feet ~ turning ourselves inside out ~ putting our archaic dogma to sleep ~ letting go of our youth-obsessed, consumptive prima-donna fixations in favor of healthier, more intelligent and balanced perceptions. To accomplish such a task would most certainly require letting go of the idea of our inherent badness.
My metaphorical flower lived and flourished in a beautiful monastic garden. Adam and Eve were cast out of a garden like this into the realm of time, and symbolically, we've been paying the price ever since. We are sick, and we are shameful ~ so now we grow old, and we die. The holy land we so desperately want to regain entry into? Where else could it realistically be but within our own hearts? We roam through our lives, searching externally ~ exiling ourselves from our true nature. Thinking we are separate from each other, we believe a terrible lie that we simply aren't good enough. We commit violence to ourselves by thinking this way. We terrorize our inner world, believing we are unworthy of inhabiting our own hearts.
These are powerful, life-transforming metaphors, which are not unique to any one true religion. We stop ourselves short of the full-spectrum of truth by fixating on literal interpretations. Digging deeper into the spiritual soil, which knows no time and no boundaries, is where you'll find the most valuable treasure. Jesus, Moses, Muhammad, and the Buddha fearlessly and passionately devoted their lives to creating a language of spirit their cultural contemporaries would readily understand. If we wish to survive in this garden, we must find a contemporary metaphor for peace. One that makes sense in our modern world that we all can identify with.
I believe for this to happen, (fortunately or unfortunately, you can decide) many charitable deaths will be required. Lovely petals, brilliant and radiant, all well-intended and inspired, need to wither and die for us to see our commonality. We must declare a jihad on our egotistical, separatist religiosity. To achieve rebirth and true peace, we desperately need to see each other as spiritual beings, but without all the creedal accessorizing.
We are stardust and we are sweat. We are blooms and we are bile. We cannot have one without the other. There must be a death to manisfest a resurrection. Life without death would be no life at all.
To survive, we must make this leap ~ we must take this chance.
To everyone, Christians, believers, and men and women of good will, I say: Do not be afraid to take a chance on peace, to teach peace. The aspiration for peace will not be disappointed for ever. Work for peace, inspired by charity which does not pass away, will produce its fruits. Peace will be the last word of History.
~ Pope John Paul II
Charitable Death ~ Canon 30d
If I had but two loaves of bread,
I would sell one and buy hyacinths,
for they would feed my soul.
~ Muhammad
Salvation Flower ~ Canon 30d
Teach this triple truth to all:
A generous heart, kind speech, and a life of service and compassion
are the things which renew humanity.
~ Buddha
As always, the murmurs of your heart expressed in the comment section are always welcomed and respected. What do you think? How do you find peace? I bow to all the teachers whose compassionate lessons I have learned from in my life. This entry draws from my many years as a Christian, from the philosophy of Joseph Campbell, and most recently, from the teachings of Tara Brach, Sharon Salzberg and Robert Thurman, as well as the generosity of spirit exemplified through the programs at the National Cathedral. Thank you.
Posted by vincent at April 27, 2006 08:20 PM
Comments
Great post. I am dealing with a lot of spiritual issues of my own right now, and love checking your blog every day to see what you're thinking about.
I'm sure you've heard this idea, that everyone that touches us in our lives is a mirror that holds up to us some aspect of ourselves. Well, some people who touch my life just annoy the living sh*t out of me, and I think how scary that is...how annoying I must be to some.
And then I relax a little, because I have you as a friend...and you are wise, profound, thoughtful and introspective, as well as intelligent and not just a little silly. So I take some serious comfort in that, very very serious comfort:) I like my reflection here!
love,
tam
Posted by: tamara at April 27, 2006 09:01 PM
i'm ready, so ready. your words contain such healing insight and your photographs are a beautiful companion.
i'm currently reading a book by tara brach and it's changing my life.
Posted by: la vie en rose at April 27, 2006 09:58 PM
Life is indeed a journey, and we spend an inordinate amount of time asking for specific directions because of our fear of taking the wrong roads. We also spend way too much time erasing all those tapes that play in our heads from our upbringing, if we can erase them at all. What if we just were able to trust that the journey would be enough? We are enough... we are all enough. Then we'd be free to walk down any path and learn to love ourselves and others. Wonderful images and beautiful post Susan. Hugs to you, fellow journeywoman.
Posted by: samtzmom at April 28, 2006 07:09 AM
Live simply so that others may simply live. Leave anger and hate on the side of the road where we find them and carry only what is necessary for us to live. Share the bounty and leave the earth a better place for the children and the creatures who will follow us. That is our work. Too few people go into the garden fearing that they will lose sight of their work, never realizing that the garden is where their work must be. Susan, you are doing a wonderful job.
jzr
Posted by: jzr at April 28, 2006 08:31 AM
Amazingly insightful. I will never look at a dying tulip in the same way again. In fact, I might just anxiously, joyously await the death to relive the truth.
Posted by: candy at April 28, 2006 10:06 AM
graceful walking by your side, i feel your heart, The colors are true and they sing many tunes..
longing suffering hoping forgiving sharing accepting carrying the extra load smiling holding the hand of the leper rising seeking being holy communion..the seeds we plant create the garden..to live and let live, to bloom and fade and send a fragrant perfume to heal the world.
Posted by: tongue in cheek at April 28, 2006 04:22 PM
You said it all for me.
Posted by: janet at April 29, 2006 04:58 PM