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Lent

March 01, 2006

ph_mar_lent.jpg
Lent begins today, and to be honest, this is the first time I've given the season any serious consideration. Perhaps it has something to do with Rob and me photographing the Shrine of the Immaculate Conception here in DC extensively over the past few months. I've been exposed to more renderings and replicas of the Holy Virgin than any other member of the Preston clan... ever.

Perhaps my Christian Scientist paternal grandmother is rolling over in her grave right now. You see, the image above which is on sale in a Catholic Basilica is of me, her granddaughter.

Did anyone else feel the earth move... or was it just me?

In spite of my quirky Christian Scientist grannie, my childhood wasn't filled with much church-going to speak of. I do remember being dragged to Sunday school once where I was forced to create macaroni art when I was all of 4 years old. Even at this tender age, I found the exercise incredibly silly.... macaroni is for EATING, for god's sake! What a waste of perfectly good carbohydrates! True to my strong-willed stubborn nature, I dug in the heels of my Stride Rights and never returned.

It wasn't until high school that I started attending an evangelical Episcopalean church. { Yes, I just wrote "evangelical" and "Episcopalean" in one sentence, you weren't mistaken... it's very long story I won't get into.. at least not now. }

I attended this Episcopal church for oh, about 5 years, and although I always knew when the season of Lent commenced, I knew no one who actually observed it in a formal way as some of my catholic acquaintances would. I guess Epicopaleans, just like my 4 year old self, believed giving up macaroni and cheese for Lent would be akin to carbohydrate abuse. God must really love Anglicans.

So~I have no real experience with Lent, except from afar, watching friends give up chocolate, alcohol, rice crispies and macaroni. To be honest... it never made much sense to me. I knew Lent symbolized Jesus' 40 days in the wilderness... but if I recall, he never gave up macaroni to do so. As a matter of fact, didn't he spend a lot of his time eating grasshoppers? Why don't we all eat grasshoppers from now until Easter? This would make better sense... at least in a technical sort of way ~ and would certainly bring us to a point of utter gratitude toward God for giving us the luxurious gift of elbow-shaped pasta.

Of course, we're speaking of metaphors. One gives up something, I rekon, to rely more upon God, and less on macaroni. It's a good idea to remind ourselves at least once a year that God cares about us much more than the Macaroni Gods ever will.

I visited Maggie Dawn's blog yesterday and read a 5-part series on Lent which was posted last year. I learned quite a bit. Lent isn't about giving up luxury items. It's supposed to be about giving up something we feel is a necessity.

"In the end, it's about denying yourself some of the essentials of everday life in order to focus on the reality that we depend upon God for life itself; about re-aligning ourselves with God and his purposes in our world; about reminding ourselves that all we have is a gift from God in any case."

Giving up carbs for forty days? South Beach doctrine... not real Christianity.

So, I'm contemplating Lent this evening. I'm not catholic, nor am I anglican. Many christians wouldn't consider me to be part of their flock either... I'm a bit of a maverick of sorts. It's rather difficult to peg me or contain my beliefs. I do belive God is a wonderfully creative mystery. Our human definitions and dogma ultimately fall short... as well they should. If God had wanted everything to be easily understood and obvious, then she would have created it that way. The question is, "How do I learn to be at peace with this? How do I sit with it?"

I'll ask the question again, "How do I sit, or rest with the grand mysteries of life?"

I think I may have touched on an answer last night. I attended the first of 5 classes at the Washington Cathedral to learn Buddhist meditation from one of our country's most celebrated teachers ~ Sharon Salzberg. I'm hoping it will improve my meditation practice, which I've slacked off of over the past several weeks, and I could really use the motivation.

Last night, I strode through one of the side entrances to the cathedral, the one that is elegantly inscribed with the words, The Way of Peace. How truly fitting. I walked the way of peace which led me to Bethlehem Chapel, where I embarked on becoming a disciple of lovingkindness and compassion. Not only for the world, but most importantly, for myself.

As we entered into our first go at meditation as a group, Ms. Salzberg said something that sparked a light inside of me. We were focusing on breathing, and she asked us to sit with our breath. To sit on it the way a butterfly rests on the petals of a flower. We breathe in, and the butterfly opens it's wings. We breathe out, and the wings gently close. It is a beautifully elegant way of visualizing being with god. I can't think of a lovlier metaphor.

If Lent is a time to deny ourselves of some essentials with the goal of realizing we depend upon God for our existence, I think I will choose to deny myself the urge to GO GO GO, and DO DO DO. I will give up the perceived necessity of thinking I'm not good enough, that I am not worthy of holiness. I will once and for all alight upon the silken petals of the Rose of Sharon, fully human, breathing in and breathing out ~ LOVE.

May we all give up the lie that we are alone, that we are not important, that the happiness of others somehow takes away from our own happiness. Giving up our need to control, releasing, blossoming, opening to light and love.

(it feels good to be writing again!)

Posted by vincent at March 1, 2006 12:00 AM

Comments

...and peace to you this season, Susan.

Posted by: dan at March 1, 2006 02:31 AM

Susan, that brought tears to my eyes. It was just stunningly beautiful and true. And reining in that need to go, go, go and do, do, dos is a perfect way to remind ourselves that we are not in control. Many blessings to you during this season of Lent.

Posted by: samtzmom at March 1, 2006 06:41 AM

thank you for writing that post. important things to remember.

i always enjoy your photos!

Posted by: erin at March 1, 2006 07:07 AM

This is the first year (as a Catholic or otherwise) that I personally found out about "Pancake Tuesday". Apparently, the day before Lent begins, you're supposed to use up your flour products - maybe historically because you WERE giving up carbs? - so you made pancakes with them and sucked them down. It's a bit like a personal New Orleans Fat Tuesday, to be enjoyed in the comfort of your own home;)

I've always found it difficult to decide on something suitable to give up - or add in - for Lent. It always seems to be something that I'd been wanting to do anyway, which seemed not quite right. So I am still waiting today for a good idea to dawn. Perhaps I'll eschew carbs until one does...

By the way, my kids and I quite enjoyed Pancake Tuesday, and may celebrate it often!

Good seeing you Q...we must do that much more often:)

Huggggs,
Tam

Posted by: tamara at March 1, 2006 09:34 AM

CCCC believes we should ADD something during Lent like prayer, reading the Bible, or MEDITATING. I think you are doing it all just right.

Posted by: janet at March 1, 2006 03:45 PM

Your still a maverick.

Posted by: Andrew at March 1, 2006 08:01 PM

Wow, what a beautiful post, Susan. You speak words that ring true to my heart.

"I do belive God is a wonderfully creative mystery. Our human definitions and dogma ultimately fall short... as well they should. If God had wanted everything to be easily understood and obvious, then she would have created it that way."

Posted by: aola at March 2, 2006 08:56 PM

Thanks for sharing your journey to Lent. Your honesty and candor about your faith background and your search for a greater faith is most refreshing. Makes the heart glad. I am a retired clergy and have long read Maggie Dawn's blog, and concur with your quote from her. Reading her blog and seeing the photos you post often make my day.
My memory quote (something I will repeat every day during Lent) comes from Anthony of Padua - - You can't kill love! You can crucify it, but it will always rise again. Thanks ever so much for your blog. Blessings.

Posted by: Wil at March 5, 2006 03:10 PM