« Previous | Main | Next »
Guest Artist ~ Lauren Parks, Hip Hopper Ankle Stopper
October 10, 2005
Some people will do anything to be featured as guest artist on my blog, and Lauren Parks is no exception. She went to great lengths during our dance class on Sunday night, demonstrating a phenomenal amount of grace and precision at Sahara Dance Center ~ so much so, the powers that be here at Visual~Voice simply MUST proclaim today LAUREN PARKS GUEST PERFORMANCE ARTIST DAY!!!
On Sunday evening just as our Fusion Hip Hop Belly Dance workshop was winding down to a close, (yes, I just wrote the words hip hop belly dance) Lauren embarked upon what surely began as an awe-inspiring move ~ she Hopped! when she should have Hipped!, landing in a lump of spandex in the middle of the dance floor. When the dust settled she was on her back clutching her leg in the air. To our horror, her foot was precariously dangling from where her ankle should have been. It reminded me of a very sad christmas ornament drooping from a very pain-inflicted, seized-up Christmas tree.
(The drawing up there is of Lauren's ankle... I picked Andrea up at the hospital last night to take us to dinner at the Macaroni Grill. We felt bad about leaving Lauren at the hospital, so I went wild with the complimentary crayons. Can you tell why I'm a photographer and not an illustrator?)
I've never seen a group of women go so silent so quickly. After the thud! and the snap! and the, "Oh my GOD! I'm NOT KIDDING! MY ANKLE IS BROKEN!" screams that flew like startled seagulls from Lauren's throat, we ~ her wise and wonderful dance buddies ~ stood frozen like deer in the headlights of her performance-art body-sculpture on display in the middle of the dance floor. Nobody dared move. Surely if anybody moved blood would come gushing out of her toes or something. It was really rather grotesque and awe-inspiring all at the same time.
"WOULD SOMEBODY CALL 911????" Lauren seethed through clenched teeth, and suddenly all of us sprung out of our trances and into frenzied action. The sound of jingling hip scarves shaking through the room.
Two people were down by her head and trying to figure out tender ways to comfort her. Classmates bounced off of mirrored walls in search of their cell phones. The timid floated up toward the ceiling and vaporized out through the door, while others stood with looks of pained disbelief on their faces.
Where was I during all the commotion? I crawled over and started rubbing her temples and telling her to breath like a Buddha. As Lauren diligently made air sucking and blowing noises, I found myself floating back to the third grade when John Gainey jumped me during Boys Chase Girls out on the playground. He squarely tackled me, and in a split second I thrust my arms out to cushion the fall, landing with a compound fracture in my right arm. To this day, I can still feel the pain ~ it is forever etched into my marrow.
So, I patted and stroked her head while staring like a frightened child at her christmas ornament ankle. It was a train wreck I couldn't wrench my eyes away from. I knew precisely how much pain she was in, and searched for the right words to say... "Breathe, Lauren," was the best I could come up with.
A couple of cuss words was all that she uttered, to my complete amazement, followed by the longest 10 minutes anyone has ever endured in human history. As the fire truck arrived, the owner of the dance studio promised Lauren pain killers were only moments away. We all brightened at the thought Lauren would be floating away on a puffy Percosset cloud... a cloud that was blown away by Mr. Fireman who brilliantly announced, "Sorry, we can't give you pain killers." His partner followed in through the door and as he assessed Lauren's dangling ankle, his left eyebrow shot up, a wince tightened across his face, his poorly trimmed mustache fluttered and with eyeballs bulging he blurted out, "Oh man, this is really NOT good."
FIREMAN RULE #1: DO NOT ANNOUNCE TO THE PATIENT HOW BAD THE SITUATION IS. LIE TO THE PATIENT... GIVE THE PATIENT SUGAR PILLS AND TELL HER THEY ARE NARCOTICS. DO WHATEVER YOU CAN TO HYPNOTIZE THE PATIENT, BUT FOR GOD'S SAKE! DON'T TELL HER HOW BAD IT IS!
I sat there wondering what could possibly happen next. Would goblins bust out of her kneecap before this was all over? Would they have to amputate right there on the dance floor? WHY CAN'T YOU GIVE MY FRIEND HER BELOVED SHOT IN THE BUTT PAINKILLER? CAN'T YOU SEE HER ANKLE IS DOING A CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT IMPRESSION????
GEEZ!
The firemen, it turned out, must have been very good at fighting fires, but they were at a complete loss when it came to splinting and comforting. One of them offered to hold her leg for her. After abruptly moving it in the process of holding it, Lauren summarily fired the fireman and sent him over to sit in a corner for punishment. The remaining firemen acted as though their careers depended upon holding her leg absolutely still until the ambulance arrived.
FIREMAN RULE #2: DON'T SHAKE OR RATTLE ANYONE WITH A CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT FOR AN ANKLE. IT COULD COST YOU YOUR LIFE.
When the ambulance crew did arrive, they cautiously approached with splints in hand and told her to grit her teeth.
"WHERE ARE MY PAIN KILLERS?" Lauren politley asked.
"Sorry, we can't give you pain killers," the EMT replied.
AMBULANCE CREW RULE #1: DON'T FORGET THE FUCKING PAIN KILLERS. BRING THE PAIN KILLERS IN WITH THE SPLINTS AND GERNY.
Is it just me? What harm would a shot of lidocaine have done?
Now, Andrea, Lauren's roommate, and my very good friend, is what many would call a Super-Catholic. She never misses mass, knows and follows many if not ALL of the super-catholic rules and regulations, and I think she just might have an "in" with Benedict. When she heard there were no pain killers to be had, she shifted gears into Catholic Overdrive Mode.
It started as a murmur, and then started to grow. I couldn't make it out at first, but slowly realized Andrea and Lauren were chanting Hail Mary's as the paramedics began splinting her dangling ankle. Of course, not being Catholic myself, I was impressed by this bold display of public prayer. This was belly dance class, and not school, after all, so it was perfectly legal. It reminded me of watching Band of Brothers on HBO... two soldiers stuck in a fox hole while a medic amputates the wounded's ankle. As bombs explode all around them, they offer up their hails to Mary ~ the orchestra's string section swells with unbelievable drama.
I was honestly struck by how much their prayers sounded like a mantra. Over and over, they said the words through deep and measured breathing. Lauren didn't scream or freak out. Seriously, it was rather amazing. Last year I laid on a mat in the very spot Lauren was postrate with pain during a dancer's yoga class. It was the wierdest sensation of deja vu I've ever experienced.
Funny how life's images shift and overlap sometimes.
Lauren was shaking with pain. I think we were all shaking along with her. You really don't want to break an ankle. It's terrifically awful.
By the time the xrays were done and the diagnosis was made, it was past midnight. We got to watch as the doctor examined her... the ankle popped in and out of location twice as the nurse marvelled at how and why it wouldn't stay in place. The bones on either side were fractured, leaving absolutely no support. Did I mention they didn't give her any pain killers until AFTER they popped it in and out of place two times?
EMERGENCY ROOM RULE #1: GIVE THE PATIENT PAIN KILLERS BEFORE PLAYING BOTCHI BALL WITH HER ANKLE.
I also came this close to being deported from the ER. While we waited endlessly for the exam and pain killers to arrive, Andrea and I hovered over her bed. Lauren got a bit schmeepy at one point and said, "I'm SO GLAD you guys are here! The power of touch is so incredible! I love you guys!"
This immediately inpsired me to break into song ~ I did a soulful rendition of Cartman's You Guys are My Best Friends from Southpark, right in the middle of Sibley Hospital's ER. It made both of them laugh their heads off, which is the best painkiller I know of. Unfortunately, Nurse Kratchit of the ER didn't agree with me. She marched over and threatened to draw and quarter me if we didn't shut up. Seems as though screaming in agony is allowed, but chuckling isn't. (There were no code reds going on and only one other patient in the ward at the time.) In my experience, a little bit of Cartman goes a long way toward healing the wounds of the world.
You guys are my best friends,
Through thick and thin,
We'll always be together.
We're three of a kind,
having fun all day.
Palling around,
Laughing away.
We're best friends!
Best friends are we!
My creative rendition of Lauren without pain killers... surrounded by Macaroni Grill bread crumbs.
She was finally admitted to the hospital at midnight and scheduled for surgery the next day. The operation was supposed to happen in the morning, but since they had to squeeze her into the schedule, it didn't happen til 3:30 pm yesterday afternoon. After being without food and water since before dance class the day before, I think she was really HAPPY to go under the knife when it finally happened. The prognosis is good, thank god. She should be back on the dance floor in 3 months. Andrea was there when she came out of recovery. She called me after they wheeled her into her room, and I heard Lauren in the background asking if she was "on the blog" yet. I said I was working on it ~ what a ham!
Please, everyone hold Lauren in your thoughts and prayers. She lost her job 2 months ago, and is without health insurance. She's been temping for the last 6 weeks, but will need a new assignment that is close to public transporation while her ankle heals. She's under an incredible amount of stress right now, between the surgery, hospital stay, and impending medical bills. She's a tough cookie, and will make it through this, but holding her in the light can only help!
Lauren is our dance friend,
Through thick and thin
We'll always be together.
If one of us falls,
and has a hospital stay
We'll sing in the ER,
laugh it away.
We're hip hop bellydancers...
Bellydancers are we!
Posted by susan at October 10, 2005 08:36 AM
Comments
This is fabulous-thank you, Susan. I'm sure Lauren will be pleased to be so immortalized.
Posted by: Andrea at October 11, 2005 01:46 PM
Give Lauren a hug for me when you or Andrea see her. I remember her infectious laugh when we all went out last March and hope she'll be able to laugh heartily again soon.
Posted by: janet at October 11, 2005 03:15 PM
Susan, this entry is amazing! Thank you for finding such beauty in my experience. I needed that!
I'm out of the hospital now and trying to get used to the pain, and walking with crutches.
Thanks again for immortalizing me in your blog, and for all of your help. You are definately an angel among us!
Posted by: Lauren at October 11, 2005 06:06 PM
Oh man, this is totally NO fun for Lauren! She was so lucky to have two good friends there at the time, to make her laugh and keep her sane during the long hours. But walking on crutches... Also NO fun! I had to do that for a month recently, and didn't enjoy it at all. Except for those couple of times when I could zoom really fast across some completely flat, smooth surface. That part's fun.
Lauren, you are surrounded by healing light! Filled with healing light! Your heart is full of healing loving Light, which is flooding outward in all directions to fully suffuse your being! (oooh, you look pretty that way!) Prayers for strong, straight mending of ankle bones are underway too. :-)
Posted by: Wandering Willow at October 11, 2005 08:07 PM
Susan, you write divinely!
Prayers from here too...
Posted by: dan at October 11, 2005 11:48 PM
Oh my GOSH, this post has me terrified of breaking anything. I mean, one expects that the helping professionals of health care and rescue would be the ones helping us NOT be in pain. Not moving our ankles around and mumbling about not having available pain killers. And then, when you get to the ER, don't we all expect the pain meds are the first thing? Before bone shifting?
sheesh
Posted by: Real Live Preacher at October 12, 2005 03:10 PM
Susan, this is an amazing entry!! You are a fabulous writer! As a paramedic, I would have given Lauren a ton of pain meds (those guys were idiots). Your descriptions of the situation made me cry with laughter. Grant you, I know I am laughing at Lauren's poor expense. Also, your observation of "Sister" Andrea's Hail Marys was over top! Try having to grow-up with this "ultra Catholic" chick for a sister! I swear I practically trip over her when we go up for communion because she practically kisses the floor before us. (To all who reads these, Andrea is my little sis, and I love her and her love of the Catholic religion to death.)
Susan, keep up the great writing, photography. I look forward to your blog everyday. I miss you, I enjoyed spending time with you in Mexico.
Good luck to Lauren. --- Bernadette
Posted by: Bernadette at October 12, 2005 03:20 PM
Susan,
You are such a delight. No wonder my Andrea is such good friends with you. Your writing styles are so much alike.
I like Bernadette miss you also.
I so enjoy all your writing and beautiful pictures but this one takes the cake, well the Me Ow was really darling also.
Such a gifted writer.
To Lauren, my prayers are with you.
love
beth
Posted by: Beth at October 18, 2005 09:15 AM
Please visit
my e-card site:
